Don’t Tell Anyone Sh**!

This title Don’t Tell Anyone Sh** came from lessons I’ve learned in life about human nature. As a young adult into early adulthood I  was very trusting of people and their concern for my overall well being. I knew that was unrealistic but my natural instinct was to trust people. As I got older I began to understand that telling people about your life opens you up to them giving unsolicited opinions. Initially, I took the advice other people gave me to heart.  I believed their suggestion was a sign from a higher power. 

The more I grew and got older I learned their advice wasn’t from a higher power. Their advice wasn’t even something I should’ve been listening to. I’m sure sometimes people have good intentions but I’m also sure it’s because people don’t trust themselves so they don’t trust others who trust themselves. Often, other people see things in us that we don’t see in ourselves and that makes them uncomfortable. This happens without them even knowing it.

The advice we get from other people is based on their past experiences. We all look at life through the lens of our past experiences. Past experiences can include our childhood environment, our friends’ experiences, our family experiences or our most recent experiences. Keep in mind these experiences are personal and only belong to us. Two people can be at the same event and describe it differently because of their perception on life, which comes from past experiences. The advice we give others isn’t based on their experiences, it’s based on our experiences.

I’ve learned listening to other people will have me doubting myself. There have been many times I’ve come up with a great plan that has me excited. So excited that I wanted to express my happiness with others. As soon as I tell the wrong person they come up with a reason or two on why that plan won’t work. Several years ago I remember telling one of my good friends I wanted to move from Mississippi to Texas. I even went to Texas for a job interview. I came back and told my friend about it and the first thing she said was “you know you’re not really going to move there.”  She said it was more of a vacation trip. 

When she said that I believed it for a few minutes. Thankfully, the desire within me was bigger than her negativity. My friend made that comment because of her past experiences.  It had nothing to do with what she thought I could and couldn’t do. It was strictly based on her limited beliefs. I believe it also came from a place of small thinking. I was always a big thinker and I knew there was more to this world than what I saw everyday.  I’m now living in Texas and I’ve been here for over 10 years. That lesson taught me that even the people closest to us can hold us back from our desires if we let them. 

Sometimes it’s hard to make a move when your vision is bigger than your current mindset. Allowing outside voices to interfere with what already has you nervous can lead to self doubt. Trusting yourself is a must. Even if you can’t trust yourself, put your trust in a higher power. Whenever you have self doubt or negative thoughts allow yourself to say Source/Universe/God I give these thoughts to you because they aren’t helping me. Do that every time you feel doubt. Make it a habit of letting go of those negative thoughts. Over time you will learn to trust yourself.

Moral of the story:

Stop or at least limit what you tell other people about your plans. 

TRUST YOURSELF!